How im feeling

I FINALLY got the perfect oppertunity to crossdress. My brother and parents where at work. So I decided to put on a white blouse a skirt, white laced panties and a black bra. I also tried a black dress, it was fairly short and I looked like a total slut! Since Im young I could probably pull it off, but I would probably not wear it in public until my confidence was built up. I have still not gone out in public btw, mostly because I do not have a car and I dont want my neighbors to see me and tell my family, we know the neighbors fairly well. I absolutely LOVED the way I did my make up, I can DEFINETLY pass. The only problem is that I do not have a wig :(. Since I still live at home there is no possible way for me to get one either. In the pictures that Im going to link you cannot see my face precisely because I want to wait until I have a wig to show people what I look like. The lipstick I have is fairly bold red and for some reason I can pull it off! It also tastes like cherry which is a total turn on I am haveing some trouble with My eyeliner, my lines are WAY to big and not very smooth. I guess itll come with practice. My blush was perfect as always and my prominent cheek bones help me look even better!. I just need some practice tucking, i always have a massive bulge when straight up only wearing panties. (If any of you have any tips that would be greatly appreciated!)

I have recently been making A lot of research and been thinking a LOT about my crossdressing and have decided that when I move out, I will try becoming a women full time and see how it REALLY feels like to be a women. I will not have any operations right away but I might consider it in time. We only live once, so I decided that once I can, I will give it a full go. Some of you might nbotice that I am more positive about my crossdressing than on my first post,.This is mostly because I have accepted myself as who I am and going to try to make the best of it! I cannot deny who I really am and thats how I am looking forward on living my life! I wonder how it would be to become a straight transexual (meaning I like Women)

I have noticed though, that the more I crossdress, the more I want to become a women and stop being the person I am now. For some crossdressing is a means of escaping their present lives, This is not me at the momment, my life is great. I have good grades, several friends and a nice family to depend on and even a part time job. Im almost sure my family would never accept me as a girl, so for now I will not tell them, and when I try full time, I will most likely be in another city, so they ill not find out until I am ready. They will Have to know if I get an operation, but well see about that. I have even considered that I will have my legal name changed if I go forward being a women. I havealso wondered if any of you think I will get hired at an office job if someone realizes that I am a man. Should I say when I apply? I wonder if its easy to find a job if you admit to being a transsexual. Well see, I guess